Monday, December 31, 2007

the rising tide

a few days ago, my mom found dooby online. we think he got out from the people we gave him to and couldn't find his way back home, so another family picked him up and took him to an animal care center.

today my dad, jeff, and i visited him there, and he was so incredibly happy to see us. we played with him for a while, but my mother had forbidden us from taking him home. so we left.

i think maybe i never want to fall in love.

//edit: after numbing the pain with arrested development, this post is so emo in retrospect

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Sunday, December 23, 2007


so less than an hour after i got back, i went to visit jasper and plano

jasper was fine, i got to see mrs. booth, mr. stanton (<33333), and mrs. fischer. i looked for mrs. walker too but she was gone! i found out that she's actually at plano now! and i was like yay that's where i'm gone. mme gould is really gone though =( omg those halls were so congested i forgot what it was like.

then i went to plano. HAAAATE PLANO ADMIN!!!! where i visited mrs. stanton. then my mom called me telling me to wait to pick up my brother, and damn mr. davis saw me on the phone. i was like oh shit and told him i wasn't a student there, which is true. then he was like "where's your visitor's badge?" dammit!!! so i had to go to the office to get a visitor's badge. when i got there, the receptionist was like which teacher are you here to see? WTF? i had to make an appointment? why are there so many fucking rules now??? i was like uhh mrs. stanton and she was like "you're not on the list. what's your name?" "grace." "nope, not on here. i can't let you in." at which point i started crying again because it was turning into a terrible first day back home - first the delay, then dooby, then something i probably should never publish/put in writing ever because it's sort of incriminating, then this. luckily, ms. smith (my mock trial coach) happened to be there in the office and she was like "grace yao??" and she saved me because the receptionist was just like..."here you deal with her." so i told her about dooby and she felt bad and let me go. i visited a bunch of other teachers and everyone was happy to see me except the stupid plano administrators!! hate hate hate.

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Friday, December 21, 2007



Low: So today, after a trip that was completely disastrous except for the fact that Britni went through it all with me, I called my mom as I walked off the plane, and she said she was here. After picking up my luggage, I looked around baggage claim, where she said she'd be, and I couldn't find her. I was hoping she'd bring Dooby since usually when our family picks one of us up from the airport, we bring him because we don't want to leave him at home alone. Twenty minutes later, she appears (without Dooby). On the way back home, we just talked about college and stuff. Finally, I asked casually, "So Dooby's at home by himself?" My mom got really quiet, and I knew no good was in the future. She started telling about how he's gotten really aggressive since I left my mom, my dad, and other people. The last straw was when he bit my brother so hard that his fingernail almost fell off. Of course, Dooby had to go, so they gave him away.

The whole time she was telling the story, I knew what the ending would be, but I just denied it to myself. Even after she told me, I was simply stunned and angry. Why did they give him away? (The answer is obvious.) Why didn't they tell me? (I didn't ask, but I'm thinking it's probably because they didn't want to distract me from schoolwork.) Then, when the realization finally hit me, I started crying for the first time since I left home. My mom was definitely teary too, but she told me not to think of all the cute things he did and just think of how dangerous he was now. This made sense in my head, but I couldn't help it! I just remembered all his little idiosyncrasies - how he looked ashamed when he knew he done bad after we caught him chewing up tissues from the trash can, how he runs to the bathroom when we tell him "timeout" and is supposed to stay in the corner but sometimes leaves and when we crack open the door and catch him he'll sneak back to the corner, how I taught him to shake, high-five, super-high-five, and guess which hand the treat was in, how he ran around the house in a perfectly predictable way and we would chase him, how he loved to play so much, how soft his fur was, how he would sigh and flop on the couch...but I knew if he was that fierce, we would have to part with him. I just couldn't stop crying until I realized that I would be visiting my high school in an hour and how I would be all red and disgusting, so I'm holding it in right now. Still, when I walked in from the garage door, there was a little tiny hope that this was not real and Dooby would be in the bathroom, whimpering and scrabbling on the door to get out. I think I put him, or at least my love for him, on a pedestal, which half-blinds me to his faults. I still can't help it though!

I walked through the house and saw his little doggie house with his bed inside. My mom's letting me sleep in her room, and when I walked in, all I could think of was how in the mornings, he would jump at the side of her bed, asking her to pick him up. I know, when I walk to the front door, I'll think of all the times I took him out and complained about having to pick up his poop and wish I'd done it more often and less begrudgingly. When I walk to the kitchen, I'll think of his little water dish and food bowl in the corner and how he only ate from them when he was reeeeally really hungry - he always begged for our food otherwise. When I walk into the living room, I'll see the mantle by the fireplace where we put his toys in a box and he would be smart and get the ones he liked and where we cracked open the treats that were too big for him and make him do tricks for them.

I can't believe the one thing I missed most while I was gone isn't here anymore and will never be.

High: I'm home, I guess.

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is the number of Sleep Inn, the hotel at which I am spending the night in Fairburn, Georgia (just outside of Atlanta).
This morning, when I woke up, pretty snow was floating down from the grey Boston sky, and it made me happy. Later, I went outside and realized...the fluffy snow was great, but it still turned into slush on the street.

So Tracy came to McCormick and took my carry-ons while I carried/dragged my 40-pound suitcase though the dirty slush to Kendall Square. After a tearful (not really) goodbye, I took the Red Line to South Station, then got on the Silver Line to Logan. At Logan, I checked in and the attendant checking me in asked me if it was okay that I get an exit seat. I just chirped, "Sure!" but in my head, I was thinking HAAYYL YEAH!! Then, I found out my flight was actually on time!!! YAYYYYY!! Like...pretty much the only flight at the airport that wasn't delayed by like 4 hours or cancelled. I also happened upon like a gang of 7 MIT kiddos (2 of them are AXOS), all going to Atlanta too! My dad called, and I told him the good news, so he said he'd pick me up at 9:30 when I got back to DFW.

I boarded the plane, stretched out my legs in all that extra room (yessss seat 22C!), and waited. And waited. AND WAITED. About every 30 minutes, the pilot would come on and say that "such-and-such is happening, we'll be ready to go in 15 minutes." So our flight, which was supposed depart at 3:46, took off at about 7:15. Of course, I missed the connecting flight from Atlanta to Dallas at 8:something. Good thing I picked up Blink before I got 16 dollars I've spent lately, because it was a really fascinating read for me. Instead of being bored for 6.5 hours, I took a nap and learned about instinct. Still, I didn't get in to Atlanta until like 10, 10:30. Ughhhh and the next flight to Dallas was at 9:15 in the morning. So I'm at this little hotel with my AXO sis Britni (she's from Dallas too) and we have to wake up at 5:30 to catch a shuttle to the airport. AND they accidentally charged me like $532 for the night, when it was supposed to be $39. I called the lobby, and they said they'd fix it. I'm keeping the number just in case!

I really wanted to visit Mrs. Stanton in 2nd period tomorrow too...I hope I still have lots of time to visit Plano and Jasper =\ I won't get to DFW until 10:30 am.

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